Quotes about humor

By definition a bore is predictable. if you think you know in advance what a man is apt to say or do, you are not apt to be disagreeably surprised by him.

Old Madame du Deffand and her friends talked for fifty years without stopping. And of it all, what remains? Perhaps three witty sayings.

Among the tortures and devastations of life is this then — our friends are not able to finish their stories.

Have you any notion how many books are written about women in the course of one year? Have you any notion how many are written by men? Are you aware that you are, perhaps, the most discussed animal in the universe?

Humour is the first of the gifts to perish in a foreign tongue.

Waking up is such a peculiar and extraordinary process that I'm surprised we are able to manage it successfully so many times while we are still half asleep.

In my middle years, I have exchanged the position of the fetus for the position of a corpse.

I don't know what else one can do with a hole in one except talk about it.

Women don't suffer from penis envy. Men do.

It's a real problem to decide whether it's more boring to do something boring than to pass along everything boring that comes in to somebody else and then have nothing to do at all.

If Christianity is wine and Islam coffee, Buddhism is most certainly tea.

An autobiography is obituary in serial form with the last installment missing.