Quotes about humor

2757 quotes · 487 authors

Quotes

  1. Was it better to die in the illusion of sunshine and warmth or face death in a cold darkness of reality? Was it better to die in happy ignorance or terrified knowledge? The answer, if you’re a Londoner, is that it’s better not to die at all.

    p. 224

  2. As Conan the Barbarian famously said, “That which does not kill us does not kill us.”

    p. 262

  3. The police can live with looking corrupt, bullying, or tyrannical, but looking stupid is intolerable. It has a tendency to undermine public faith in the forces of Law and is deleterious to public order.

    p. 64

  4. “There’s more to life than just London,” said Nightingale.

    “People keep saying that,” I said. “But I’ve never actually seen any proof.”

    p. 86

  5. Like young men from the dawn of time, I decided to choose the risk of death over certain humiliation.

    p. 5

  6. Five hundred years ago the notoriously savvy Henry VIII discovered an elegant way to solve both his theological problems and his personal liquidity crisis—he dissolved the monasteries and nicked all their land. Since the principle of any rich person who wants to stay rich is, never give anything away unless you absolutely have to, the land has stayed with Crown ever since.

    p. 76

  7. You don’t actually know enough about me to insult me properly.

    p. 156

  8. When you’re a musician free is a magic number.

    p. 45

  9. So just chalk it up to pixie dust or quantum entanglement, which was the same thing as pixie dust except with the word “quantum” in it.

    p. 9

  10. “Do you feel guilty?”

    “No,” I said. “I didn’t do it to them and I did my best to stop it. But I feel guilty that I don’t feel guilty, if that helps.”

    p. 154

  11. There were screams and yells from the street below as people saw what was happening. There would be lots of phone-camera footage on the news that night from people with more media-savvy than brains.

    p. 275

  12. I looked at Lesley—surely nobody could really be that stupid? She shrugged. Lesley has a much lower opinion of humanity than I do.

    p. 153