Quotes about humor

Do you suppose Walter Hunt would have invented the safety pin if he had known that punk rockers would stick them through their cheeks?

You’d be amazed how much research you can get done when you have no life whatsoever.

I mean, the question actors most often get asked is how they can bear saying the same things over and over again night after night, but God knows the answer to that is, don’t we all anyway; might as well get paid for it.

If you are your own worst enemy, don't do yourself any favors.

Common Sense and Education: The more you think you have of one, the less you think you need of the other.

There was a beautiful row. You’ve really scared people, Hoddan! You deserve well of the republic! Every government and every person needs to be thoroughly terrified occasionally. It limbers up the brain.

Hoddan angrily suspected fate and chance of plain conspiracy against him.

For once, no eminent figure assumed the undignified pose involved in standing on one’s dignity.

It couldn’t happen! Hoddan couldn’t conceive of such a thing. But a recently developed pessimism suggested that since everything else, to date, had been to his disadvantage, this was probably a catastrophe also.

What’s the use of a high school education if you can’t recall it when needed later on?

"You are getting too old for this." "A man is as old as he feels, woman!" "And how old do you feel?" "About ninety."

Life is sad enough, Magir. Laughter is a thing to be treasured.