Quotes about humor

If it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, we have at least to consider the possibility that we have a small aquatic bird of the family Anatidae on our hands.

The teacher usually learns more than the pupils. Isn't that true?

"It would be hard to learn much less than my pupils," came a low growl from somewhere on the table, "without undergoing a pre-frontal lobotomy."

WOKING (vb.) To enter the kitchen with the precise determination to perform something only to forget what it is just before you do it.

AALST (n.) One who changes his name to be further to the front.

The door was the way to... to... The Door was The Way. Good. Capital letters were always the best way of dealing with things you didn't have a good answer to.

FAIRYMOUNT (vb. n.) Polite word for buggery.

LAXOBIGGING (ptcpl.vb.) Struggling to extrude an extremely large turd.

SHOEBURYNESS (abs.n.) The vague uncomfortable feeling you get when sitting on a seat which is still warm from somebody else's bottom

ABOYNE (vb.) To beat an expert at a game of skill by playing so appallingly badly that none of his clever tactics or strategies are of any use to him.

CLIXBY (adj.) Politely rude. Briskly vague. Firmly uninformative.

Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh.

Walk! Not bloody likely. I am going in a taxi.