Warren Farrell

Those feminists who say that masculinity is about men believing they can batter women display the deepest ignorance possible about men and masculinity.

Look under the “Love and Friendship” section and see dozens of cards designed for women to send to women, most bashing men, and virtually none saying anything loving about men.

Divorce laws have given women economic support after divorce; no laws have given men emotional support after divorce. Men are required to continue their obligations to their exes in the form of alimony or child support; women are not required to continue their obligation to their exes in the form of homemaking or nurturing.

Men are still playing protector of women’s transitions, and both sexes expect only men to make transitions on their own.

If our binoculars search for our partner’s best intent, it will usually be found.

After divorce, women’s biggest fear is economic deprivation; men’s biggest fear is emotional deprivation.

A father’s traditional role prepared him to love his family by being away from the love of his family.

We are the offspring of approval-seekers. We want approval so badly that we vacillate between conforming to get it and standing out (being outstanding) to get it.

All of these battered husbands are still with their wives. When a woman stays with a man who batters, we provide shelters to encourage her to escape. If she decides not to escape, we say she is a victim of “Battered Woman Syndrome."

Because men complained less, we made the false assumption that the complaints women experienced were only women’s complaints and, therefore, only women’s problems. Which created the rationale for women’s problems to be solved – or at least addressed – by public policy.

We think of the division of labor as being outdated, but in fact it has reemerged. In the early ‘80s, a mother was 43 times more likely than the father to leave the workplace for family responsibilities; more recently, a mom is 135 times more likely to leave the workplace for family responsibilities.

Tone of voice is more crucial than words.