Tom Holt

Quotes

1. Besides, [Saint] George pointed out, dragons burn towns and demand princesses as ransom.

   The dragons, referring to the Siege of Jerusalem, the Sack of Constantinople and a thousand years of dynastic marriages, said, Look who's talking.

2. 

   'Tact comes as naturally to full-bore handguns as, say, ice-skating to African elephants, but there comes a time when an exceptional individual is prepared to stand up and break the mould.'

3. 

   'Genies rarely have nightmares, for the same reason that elephants don't usually worry about being trampled underfoot. With the possible exception of bottles, there's nothing in the cosmos large enough or malicious enough to frighten them, or stupid enough to try.'

4. 

   'Luck, like a Russian car, generally only works if you push it.'

5. 

   '...and we have already seen how insurance is like a pyramid -

   (Huge, incomprehensible, hideously expensive, completely unnecessary and specifically designed only to be of benefit to you once you're dead?)'

6. 

   Ronnie Bosch sat in his studio, stared long and hard at his drawing board, and groaned.

7. 

   'He didn't smile - he was from Yorkshire, after all - but in some inner chamber of his heart he was satisfied.'

8. 

   It was, they told him, all part of a concept which was definitely going to be The Future as far as Hell Holdings was concerned.

   For reasons he couldn't quite grasp, but which he couldn't help but feel mildly flattering, they were going to call it EuroBosch.

9. 

   That's it?' Boamund said.

   'Basically, yes,' the hermit replied. 'I've left out Helmut von Moltke and the Peace of Nikolsburg, and maybe I skated over the Benelux customs union a bit, but I think you've got the essentials there. Anything you're not sure about, you can look up in the book.' - c. 1

10. 

    'How many spectral warriors does it take to change a light-bulb?

    One, and a stepladder. At a pinch, of course, he could stand on a chair.'

11. 

    Jason squared his shoulders, drew the Sword of - I couldn't give a toss what it's supposed to be called, he said to himself, I shall call it Freckles - and took one step forward.

12. 

    Boamund scratches his head. Imagine a knight by Alma-Tadema who's somehow managed to fall off the picture and is wondering how to get back in without breaking the glass.