You scrimped and saved to send them to the best schools, and then they went and paid you back by getting… — Terry Pratchett

The Ephebians made wine out of anything they could put in a bucket, and ate anything that couldn't climb out of one. (p. 226)

The trouble with gods is that after enough people start believing in them, they begin to exist. And what begins to exist isn't what was originally intended. (p. 297)

Battle elephants! Teppic groaned. Tsort went in for battle elephants, too. Battle elephants were the fashion lately. They weren't much good for anything except trampling on their own when they inevitably panicked, so the military minds on both sides had responded by breeding bigger elephants. Elephants were impressive. (p. 256)