"I'm suspicious about people interested in saving other people's souls." — J. P. Donleavy

"What are you going to do in London?"

"Rest from the eyes. Ever notice the eyes along the street. Ever notice them? Looking for something. And in this fine cultured city it's me."

"Mr Dangerfield, why don't you believe in hell and things like that?"

"Hell is for poor people."

"Turn to gangsterism."

"Sebastian, I couldn't."

"Tone, pride has you at its mercy."

"Has me by the very ballocks."

"Tony, I think a pint would see us right."

"I think you're right for the first time since you last said that."