Henry Beard
Quotes
Futue te ipsum et caballum tuum.
Claim it means: I've really got to take my hat off to you.
What it really means: Fuck you and the horse you rode in on.
Si hoc adfixum in obice legere potes, et liberaliter educatus et nimis popinquus ades.
If you can read this bumper sticker, you are both very well educated and much too close.
Lege atque lacrima.
Read-em and weep.
Taedium pellucidorum.
An eye condition that keeps you from looking at people's slides.
Si hoc signum legere potes, operis boni in rebus Latinis alacribus et fructuosis potiri potes!
If you can read this sign, you can get a good job in the fast-paced, high-paying world of Latin!
Having done these things, they made the sacrifices prescribed by custom lest they be found lacking in filial piety.
Podex perfectus es.
Claim it means: You did a terrific job.
What it really means: You are a total asshole.
Anates tuas in acie instrue.
Get your ducks in a row.
Si fractum non sit, noli id reficere.
If it ain't broke, don't fix it.
Nullae satisfactionis potiri non possum.
I can't get no satisfaction.
Quantum illae stolae pependisti?
You paid how much for that dress?
Stercorem pro cerebro habes.
Claim it means: That's certainly food for thought.
What it really means: You have shit for brains.
