Chuck Palahniuk

I just want some proof that death isn't the end. Even if crazed zombies grabbed me in some dark hall one night, even if they tore me apart, at least that wouldn't be the absolute end. There would be some comfort in that.

Whether you clean a stain, a fish, a house, you want to think you're making the world a better place, but really you're just letting things get worse.You think if you work harder and faster, you can hold off the chaos, but then one day you're changing a patio lightbulb with a five-year life span and you realize how you'll only be changing this light maybe ten more times before you'll be dead. Time is running out. There isn't the energy you used to have. You start to slow down. You start to give in.

You could stab a knife right through my heart and you'd be too late.

There is no Hell. There is no heaven.

The shortest distance between the points is a time line, a schedule, a map of your time, the itinerary for the rest of your life. Nothing shows you the straight line from here to death like a list.

“A girl calls and asks, "Does it hurt very much to die?" "Well, sweetheart," I tell her, "yes, but it hurts a lot more to keep living.”

The truth is you can be orphaned again and again and again.The truth is you will be.

And the secret is, this will hurt less and less each time until you can't feel a thing.

Imagine how you'd feel if your whole life turned into a job you couldn't stand. No, everybody thinks their whole life should be at least as much fun as masturbation. I'd like to see these people even try to live out of hotel rooms and find low-fat fuel room service and do a half way convincing job of faking a deep inner peace and at-oneness with God.

"Throughout history the most powerful rulers have been sex maniacs. And he asks, does their sex appetite come from having power, or does their will for power come from their sex appetite? "And if you don't crave sex," he says, "will you crave power?" No, he says. "And instead of electing decent, boring, sexually repressed officials," he says "maybe we should find the horniest candidates and maybe they can get some good work done."

People used what they called a telephone because they hated being close together and they were too scared of being alone.

Only God has the right to surprise his children with death.

More and more everything in my life was a fix for an earlier fix for an earlier fix until I forget what the original problem was.