Terry Pratchett

He was suddenly aware that he had made some lifelong enemies, and it was no consolation to know that he probably wouldn't have them for very long.

"I'm sure it's not wizardly to be alone in a lady's boudoir."

"I've never seen Death actually at work."

What's the use of having the power if you don't wield it? Man doesn't show you respect, you don't leave enough of his damn inn to roast chestnuts on, understand?

It struck Mort with sudden, terrible poignancy that Death must be the loneliest creature in the universe.

Women's clothes were not a subject that preoccupied Cutwell much—in fact, usually when he thought about women his mental pictures seldom included any clothes at all—but the vision in front of him really did take his breath away.

Only one creature could have duplicated the expressions on their faces, and that would be a pigeon who has heard not only that Lord Nelson has got down off his column but has also been seen buying a 12-bore repeater and a box of cartridges.

What are you going to do when we get there?"

"Where did you say your business was?" said Lezek. "Is it far?"

"Am I going to be crowned or not?" she said icily. "I've got to die a queen! It'd be terrible to be dead and common!"

"What do people like to drink here, then?" The landlord looked sideways at his customers, a clever trick given that they were directly in front of him.

"In a figurative sense," he said.