# Witches Abroad

- Author: [Terry Pratchett](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett.md)
- Quotes: 53
- Book page: https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad

## Quotes

> Death put down his drink and stepped forward.

p. 325 — [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/death-put-down.md)

> Granny stepped forward, her eyes two sapphires of bitterness. "I'm goin' to give you the hidin' our Mam never gave you, Lily Weatherwax. Not with magic, not with headology, not with a stick like our Dad had, aye, and he used a fair bit as I recall—but with skin. And not because you was the bad one. Not because you meddled with stories. Everyone has a path they got to tread. But because, and I wants you to understand this prop'ly, after you went I had to be the good one. You had all the fun. An' there's no way I can make you pay for that, Lily, but I'm surely goin' to give it a try..."

p. 337 — [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/granny-stepped-forward.md)

> You can't go around building a better world for people. Only people can build a better world for people. Otherwise it's just a cage. (p. 305)

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/you-cant-go-around.md)

> Magrat plunged on with the brave desperation of someone dancing in the light of their burning bridges. (p. 161)

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/magrat-plunged-on-with.md)

> Nanny Ogg quite liked cooking, provided there were other people around to do things like chop up the vegetables and wash the dishes afterwards. (pp. 203-204)

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/nanny-ogg-quite.md)

> Magic's far too important to be used for rulin' people. (p. 316)

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/magics-far-too.md)

> The footman, recognizing instantly the boundless bad manners of the well-bred, backed away quickly. (p. 262)

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/the-footman-recognizing.md)

> She hated everything that predestined people, that fooled them, that made them slightly less than human. (p. 291)

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/she-hated-everything.md)

> "I ain't against adventure, in moderation," said Granny, "but not when I'm eatin'." (p. 247)

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/i-aint-against.md)

> Asking someone to repeat a phrase you'd not only heard very clearly but were also exceedingly angry about was around Defcon II in the lexicon of squabble. (p. 162)

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/asking-someone-to-repeat.md)

> "Haven't you got any romance in your soul?" said Magrat plaintively.

p. 163 — [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/havent-you-got.md)

> "Baths is unhygienic," Granny declared. "You know I've never agreed with baths. Sittin' around in your own dirt like that." (p. 184)

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/baths-is-unhygienic.md)

> He'd never told people they ought to be happy, and imposed a kind of happiness on them. The invisible people knew that happiness is not the natural state of mankind, and is never achieved from the outside in. (p. 293)

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/hed-never-told.md)

> This one was quite likely looting towns when he should have been learning to read. (p. 267)

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/this-one-was.md)

> Emberella, thought Magrat. I'm fairy godmothering a girl who sounds like something you put up in the rain. (p. 213)

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/emberella-thought-magrat.md)

> Greebo's technique was unscientific and wouldn't have stood a chance against any decent swordsmanship, but on his side was the fact that it is almost impossible to develop decent swordsmanship when you seem to have run into a food mixer that is biting your ear off. (p. 312)

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/greebos-technique-was.md)

> "This is Greebo. Between you and me, he's a fiend from hell."

p. 210 — [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/this-is-greebo.md)

> "Good and bad is tricky," she said. "I ain't too certain about where people stand. P'raps what matters is which way you face." (pp. 348-349)

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/good-and-bad.md)

> Nanny Ogg looked him up and down or, at least, down and further down.

p. 278 — [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/nanny-ogg-looked.md)

> "I don't want to hurt you, Mistress Weatherwax," said Mrs. Gogol.

p. 319 — [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/i-dont-want.md)

> Don't you talk to me about progress. Progress just means bad things happen faster. (p. 305)

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/dont-you-talk.md)

> Apart from being as well-adapted a parasite as the oak bracket fungus, Lady Volentia D'Arrangement was, by and large, a blameless sort of person. (p. 272)

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/apart-from-being.md)

> "We're her godmothers," said Granny.

p. 317 — [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/were-her-godmothers.md)

> "I wondered about that," said Nanny. "Then I thought maybe I was imagining things."

p. 150 — [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/i-wondered-about.md)

> Racism was not a problem on the Discworld, because—what with trolls and dwarfs and so on—speciesism was more interesting. Black and white lived in perfect harmony and ganged up on green. (p. 201)

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/racism-was-not.md)

> Magrat was annoyed. She was also frightened, which made her even more annoyed. It was hard for people when Magrat was annoyed. It was like being attacked by damp tissue. (p. 229)

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/magrat-was-annoyed.md)

> "I could make some new gods and get everyone to believe in 'em real good. How about that?" said Mrs. Gogol. Nanny shook her head.

p. 343 — [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/i-could-make.md)

> Greebo wasn't a happy cat. People had made a fuss just because he'd dragged a roast turkey off the table. (p. 294)

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/greebo-wasnt-a-happy.md)

> "Anyway, it'll be int'resting to see if it works."

p. 252 — [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/anyway-itll-be-intresting.md)

> It was no longer the full-nosed roaring of a forty-winks catnapper, but the well-paced growling of someone who wanted to make a night of it.

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/it-was-no-longer.md)

> The nobles of Genua had enough experience to know what it means when a ruler says something is not compulsory. (p. 325).

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/the-nobles-of-genua.md)

> The wages of sin is death but so is the salary of virtue, and at least the evil get to go home early on Fridays. (p. 282)

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/the-wages-of-sin.md)

> Genua had once controlled the river mouth and taxed its traffic in a way that couldn't be called piracy because it was done by the city government. (p. 176)

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/genua-had-once.md)

> For wolves and pigs and bears, thinking that they're human is a tragedy. For a cat, it's an experience. (p. 268).

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/for-wolves-and.md)

> "Listen, happy endings is fine if they turn out happy," said Granny, glaring at the sky. "But you can't make 'em for other people. Like the only way you could make a happy marriage is by cuttin' their heads off as soon as they say ‘I do', yes? You can't make happiness..."

p. 139 — [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/listen-happy-endings.md)

> All witches are very conscious of stories. They can feel stories, in the same way that a bather in a little pool can feel the unexpected trout.

p. 119 — [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/all-witches-are.md)

> Bad spelling can be lethal. For example, the greedy seraph of Al-Ybi was cursed by a badly-educated deity and for some days everything he touched turned to Glod, which happened to be the name of a small dwarf from a mountain community hundreds of miles away who found himself magically dragged to the kingdom and relentlessly duplicated. Some two thousand Glods later the spell wore off. These days, the people of Al-Ybi are renowned for being unusually short and bad-tempered. (p. 6)

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/bad-spelling-can.md)

> She heard Nanny say: "Beats me why they're always putting invisible runes on their doors. I mean, you pays some wizard to put invisible runes on your door, and how do you know you've got value for money?"

p. 63 — [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/she-heard-nanny.md)

> The only way housework could be done in this place was with a shovel or, for preference, a match. (p. 147)

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/the-only-way.md)

> Nanny's mouth spread in an evil grin.

p. 110 — [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/nannys-mouth-spread.md)

> In the dim light she could see Granny's face which seemed to be suggesting that if Magrat was at her wit's end, it was a short stroll. (p. 64)

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/in-the-dim.md)

> You can be as self-assertive as you like, I said, just so long as you do what you're told. (p. 20)

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/you-can-be-as-self-assertive.md)

> If you wanted to get anywhere in this world—and she'd decided, right at the start, that she wanted to get as far as it was possible to go—you wore names lightly, and you took power anywhere you found it. She had buried three husbands, and at least two of them had already been dead. (p. 14)

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/if-you-wanted.md)

> People are riddled by Doubt. It is the engine that drives them through their lives. It is the elastic band in the little model airplane of their soul, and they spend their time winding it up until it knots. Early morning is the worst time—there's that little moment of panic in case You have drifted away in the night and something else has moved in. This never happened to Granny Weatherwax. She went straight from fast asleep to instant operation on all six cylinders. She never needed to find herself because she always knew who was doing the looking. (p. 93)

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/people-are-riddled.md)

> Granny Weatherwax didn't like maps. She felt instinctively that they sold the landscape short. (p. 27)

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/granny-weatherwax-didnt.md)

> 'Tell me,' said Magrat, 'you said your mummy knows about the big bad wolf in the woods, didn't you?'

p. 146 — [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/tell-me-said.md)

> It's a strange thing about determined seekers-after-wisdom that, no matter where they happen to be, they'll always seek that wisdom which is a long way off. Wisdom is one of the few things that looks bigger the further away it is. (p. 32)

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/its-a-strange.md)

> "I hate mirrors," muttered the Duc.

p. 71 — [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/i-hate-mirrors.md)

> The Yen Buddhists are the richest religious sect in the universe. They hold that the accumulation of money is a great evil and a burden to the soul. They therefore, regardless of personal hazard, see it as their unpleasant duty to acquire as much as possible in order to reduce the risk to innocent people. (p. 125)

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/the-yen-buddhists.md)

> Greebo turned upon Granny Weatherwax a yellow-eyed stare of self-satisfied malevolence, such as cats always reserve for people who don't like them, and purred. Greebo was possibly the only cat who could snigger in purr. (p. 48)

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/greebo-turned-upon.md)

> It's a big responsibility, fairy godmothering. Knowing when to stop, I mean. People whose wishes get granted often don't turn out to be very nice people. So should you give them what—or what they need? (p. 10).

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/its-a-big.md)

> But then...it used to be so simple, once upon a time.

p. 1 — [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/but-then-it-used.md)

> "Look," said Magrat desperately, "why don't I go by myself?"

p. 41 — [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/terry-pratchett/witches-abroad/look-said-magrat.md)
