The fascination of shooting as a sport depends almost wholly on whether you are at the right or wrong end of… — P.G. Wodehouse

Boyhood, like measles, is one of those complaints which a man should catch young and have done with, for when it comes in middle life it is apt to be serious.

Has anybody ever seen a drama critic in the daytime? Of course not. They come out after dark, up to no good.

He trusted neither of them as far as he could spit, and he was a poor spitter, lacking both distance and control.