# Kyril Bonfiglioli

- Quotes: 19
- Author page: https://www.leafyquotes.com/kyril-bonfiglioli

## Books

- [After You with the Pistol](https://www.leafyquotes.com/kyril-bonfiglioli/after-you-with-the-pistol.md) — 7 quotes
- [All the Tea in China](https://www.leafyquotes.com/kyril-bonfiglioli/all-the-tea-in-china.md) — 1 quote
- [Don't Point That Thing at Me](https://www.leafyquotes.com/kyril-bonfiglioli/dont-point-that-thing-at-me.md) — 10 quotes
- [Something Nasty in the Woodshed](https://www.leafyquotes.com/kyril-bonfiglioli/something-nasty-in-the-woodshed.md) — 1 quote

## Recently added quotes

> I don't much care about tea-drinking in the afternoon; in the morning the stuff Jock brings to me in bed is like that Nepenthe which the wife of Thone gave to Jove-born Helena, but in the p.m. it always makes me think of Ganges mud in which crocodiles have been coupling.

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/kyril-bonfiglioli/after-you-with-the-pistol/i-dont-much.md)

> You will learn nothing of importance from this story except, perhaps, how to die; but then, you were born knowing that and in any case it only has to be done once. It is easy: ask anyone who has done it.

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/kyril-bonfiglioli/all-the-tea-in-china/you-will-learn.md)

> A moral coward, you see, is simply someone who has read the fine print on the back of his Birth Certificate and seen the little clause which says "You can't win."

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/kyril-bonfiglioli/something-nasty-in-the-woodshed/a-moral-coward.md)

> "You would now be an enemy, in the third class, of my own organization."
>
> "Only third class?" I asked in the indignant tones which Queen Victoria surely used when she received the Abyssinian Order of Chastity, Second Class.

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/kyril-bonfiglioli/after-you-with-the-pistol/you-would-now.md)

> It will be a sad day for the world when the Oriental gent realizes that Western bumbling is only Eastern guile in a different idiom. Well, a lot of it, anyway.

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/kyril-bonfiglioli/after-you-with-the-pistol/it-will-be-a-sad.md)

> I have this heavy addiction to life and I'm told that the withdrawal symptoms are shocking.

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/kyril-bonfiglioli/after-you-with-the-pistol/i-have-this.md)

> The cold pork in the fridge was wilting at the edges; it and I exchanged looks of mutual contempt, like two women wearing the same hat in the Royal Enclosure at Ascot.

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/kyril-bonfiglioli/after-you-with-the-pistol/the-cold-pork.md)

> Fate's fickle finger was feeling for my fundament.

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/kyril-bonfiglioli/after-you-with-the-pistol/fates-fickle-finger.md)

> To be on foot in the United States is only immoral, not illegal.

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/kyril-bonfiglioli/dont-point-that-thing-at-me/to-be-on-foot.md)

> Sleep slunk up like a black panther and sank its kindly fangs into what remained of the Mortdecai brain.

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/kyril-bonfiglioli/after-you-with-the-pistol/sleep-slunk-up-like.md)

> The coffee having arrived (how hard it is to write without the ablative absolute!) we guzzled genteelly for a while...

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/kyril-bonfiglioli/dont-point-that-thing-at-me/the-coffee-having.md)

> "No no, Jock…we're going to push him out of a window. Your bedroom window, I think. Yes, and we'll undress him first and say that he was making advances to you and jumped out of the window in a frenzy of thwarted love."
>
> "I say, Charlie, really, what a filthy rotten idea; I mean, think of my wife."
>
> "I never think of policemen's wives, their beauty maddens me like wine."

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/kyril-bonfiglioli/dont-point-that-thing-at-me/no-no-jock-were.md)