His plan? To pass out weapons to slaves, so they could overthrow their masters. Suicide. — Kurt Vonnegut

I wish one and all long and happy lives, no matter what may become of them afterwards. Use sunscreen! Don't smoke cigarettes. Cigars, however, are good for you … Firearms are also good for you … Gunpowder has zero fat and zero cholesterol. That goes for dumdums, too.

I asked this heroic pet lover how it felt to have died for a schnauzer named Teddy. Salvador Biagiani was philosophical. He said it sure beat dying for absolutely nothing in the Viet Nam War.

What do men want? They want a lot of pals, and they wish that people wouldn't get so mad at them.