# The Portrait of a Lady - Author: [Henry James](https://www.leafyquotes.com/henry-james.md) - Quotes: 17 - Book page: https://www.leafyquotes.com/henry-james/the-portrait-of-a-lady ## Quotes > She had promised him she would consider his question [of marrying him] [...]. But this was not the case; she was wondering if she were not a cold, hard, priggish person, and, on her at last getting up and going rather quickly back to the house, felt, as she had said to her friend, really frightened at herself. [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/henry-james/the-portrait-of-a-lady/she-had-promised.md) > What he thought of her she knew, what he was capable of saying to her she had felt; yet they were married, for all that, and marriage meant that a woman should cleave to the man with whom, uttering tremendous vows, she had stood at the altar. [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/henry-james/the-portrait-of-a-lady/what-he-thought.md) > She could never rid herself of the sense that unhappiness was a state of disease – of suffering as opposed to doing. To "do" – it hardly mattered what – would therefore be an escape, perhaps in some degree a remedy. [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/henry-james/the-portrait-of-a-lady/she-could-never.md) > Don't mind anything anyone tells you about anyone else. Judge everyone and everything for yourself. [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/henry-james/the-portrait-of-a-lady/dont-mind-anything.md) > Mr Touchett used to think that she reminded him of his wife when his wife was in her teens. It was because she was fresh and natural and quick to understand, to speak – so many characteristics of her niece – that he had fallen in love with Mrs Touchett. [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/henry-james/the-portrait-of-a-lady/mr-touchett-used.md) > The working of this young lady's spirit was strange, and I can only give it to you as I see it, not hoping to make it seem altogether natural. [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/henry-james/the-portrait-of-a-lady/the-working-of-this.md) > The real offence, as she ultimately perceived, was her having a mind of her own at all. Her mind was to be his — attached to his own like a small garden-plot to a deer-park. [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/henry-james/the-portrait-of-a-lady/the-real-offence.md) > To live in such a place was, for Isabel, to hold to her ear all day a shell of the sea of the past. This vague eternal rumour kept her imagination awake. [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/henry-james/the-portrait-of-a-lady/to-live-in-such.md) > Besides, I try to judge things for myself; to judge wrong, I think, is more honourable than not to judge at all. [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/henry-james/the-portrait-of-a-lady/besides-i-try.md) > There's no more usual basis of union than a mutual misunderstanding. [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/henry-james/the-portrait-of-a-lady/theres-no-more.md) > You wanted to look at life for yourself — but you were not allowed; you were punished for your wish. You were ground in the very mill of the conventional! [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/henry-james/the-portrait-of-a-lady/you-wanted-to-look.md) > Mrs Touchett was certainly a person of many oddities, of which her behaviour on returning to her husband's house after many months was a noticeable specimen. She had her own way of doing all that she did, and this is the simplest description of a character which, although by no means without liberal motions, rarely succeeded in giving an impression of suavity. [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/henry-james/the-portrait-of-a-lady/mrs-touchett-was.md) > She often wondered indeed if she ever had been, or ever could be, intimate with anyone. She had an ideal of friendship as well as of several other sentiments, which it failed to seem to her in this case – it had not seemed to her in other cases – that the actual completely expressed. [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/henry-james/the-portrait-of-a-lady/she-often-wondered.md) > Here she drew forth a small pocket-book, took from it a card and a pencil and, after meditating a moment, wrote a few words. It is our privilege to look over her shoulder, and if we exercise it we may read the brief query: [...]. [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/henry-james/the-portrait-of-a-lady/here-she-drew.md) > "If I should cease to think of you at all for a prescribed time, I should find I could keep it up indefinitely. [...] You know that what you ask is impossible [...] I'm capable of nothing with regard to you," he went on, "but just of being infernally in love with you. If one's strong one loves only the more strongly." [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/henry-james/the-portrait-of-a-lady/if-i-should.md) > She gave an envious thought to the happier lot of men, who are always free to plunge into the healing waters of action. [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/henry-james/the-portrait-of-a-lady/she-gave-an-envious.md) > "I don't pretend to know what people are meant for," said Madame Merle. "I only know what I can do with them." [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/henry-james/the-portrait-of-a-lady/i-dont-pretend.md)