Chuck Palahniuk

"A journalist has a right... ...and a duty, to destroy the golden calves he helps create."

For the rest of history, all over the world, people will be trying to save this same dead woman. This woman who just wanted to die.

In the big factory of perfecting human souls, the Earth was a kind of tumbler. The same as the kind people use to polish rocks. All souls come here to rub the sharp edges off each other. All of us, we're meant to be worn smooth by conflict and pain of every kind. To be polished. There was nothing bad about this. This wasn't suffering. It was erosion. It was just another, a basic, an important step in the refining process.

As a fundraiser, our first idea was 'Five Bucks to Punch a Mime.'

Their teeth white, as if they never used teeth for anything except to smile.

If we can forgive what's been done to us... If we can forgive what we've done to others... If we can leave our stories behind. Our being victims and villains. Only then can we maybe rescue the world.

What you have to love about drinking is, every swallow is an irrevocable decision. You charging ahead, in control of the game. It's the same with pills, sedatives and painkillers, every swallow is a first definite step down some road.

"You are permanent, but this life is not," Mr. Whittier would say. "You don't expect to visit an amusement park, then stay forever."

You will always have some excuse not to live your life.

Everything is funnier in retrospect, funnier and prettier and cooler. You can laugh at anything from far enough away.

"It's not a matter of right and wrong," Mr. Whittier would say. Really, there is no wrong. Not in our minds. Our own reality. You can never set off to do the wrong thing. You can never say the wrong thing. In your own mind, you are always right. Every action you take--what you do or say or how you choose to appear--is automatically right the moment you act.

I lost my virginity through my ear.