Indeed, now that his efforts had been crowned with success, he was mainly conscious only of weariness, and of… — C. S. Forester
Indeed, now that his efforts had been crowned with success, he was mainly conscious only of weariness, and of something which oppressed him like despair. It was home-sickness -- not the desire for the green Sussex Downs, but the desire to be one more with his regiment, marching along with the green-clad files, exchanging jagged jests with his fellows,squatting round the camp fires, leading a life fatalistically free from anxiety and responsibility.
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There is no excuse for defeat in the military code, just as success excuses everything.
Dodd was not much moved anyway. His trade was in death, and he had seen much of it of late years. He was engaged in war, and war without death was a quite unthinkable thing.
The regiment had taught him that he must do his duty or die in the attempt; a simple enough religion for his simple mind. As long as there was breath in his body or a thought in his mind he must struggle on; as long as he went on trying there was no need to meditate on success or failure. The only reward for the doing of his duty would be the knowledge that his duty was being done. That was how honour called; and glory -- the man in the ranks did not bother with glory, nor did the men a century later who died in the poison gas at Ypres.
