# Quote — Andrew Solomon, Far From The Tree

> When parents say, "I wish my child did not have autism," what they're really saying is "I wish the autistic child I have did not exist, and I had a different [nonautistic] child instead." Read that again. This is what we hear when you mourn over our existence. This is what we hear when you pray for a cure. This is what we know, when you tell us of your fondest hopes and dreams for us: that your greatest wish is that one day we will cease to be, and strangers you can love will move in behind our faces. —Jim Sinclair

- Author: [Andrew Solomon](https://www.leafyquotes.com/andrew-solomon.md)
- Book: [Far From The Tree](https://www.leafyquotes.com/andrew-solomon/far-from-the-tree.md)
- Page: 37
- Source: [Wikiquote](https://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Andrew_Solomon#Far_from_the_Tree_(2012)) ([CC BY-SA 4.0](https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/4.0/))
- Quote page: https://www.leafyquotes.com/andrew-solomon/far-from-the-tree/when-parents-say

## More from this book

> I started this book to forgive my parents and ended it by becoming a parent. Understanding backward liberated me to live forward.

p. 677 — [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/andrew-solomon/far-from-the-tree/i-started-this.md)

> Insofar as I have written a self-help book, it is a how-to manual for receptivity: a description of how to tolerate what cannot be cured, and an argument that cures are not always appropriate even when they are feasible.

p. 701 — [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/andrew-solomon/far-from-the-tree/insofar-as-i-have.md)

> I want more than anything for my children to be happy, and I love them because they are sad, and the erratic project of kneading that sadness into joy is the engine of my life as a father, as a son, as a friend—and as a writer.

p. 701 — [Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/andrew-solomon/far-from-the-tree/i-want-more.md)