# Quote — Alice Miller, Breaking Down The Wall Of Silence

> By refusing to forgive, I give up all illusions. Why should I forgive, when no one is asking me to? I mean, my parents refuse to understand and to know what they did to me. So why should I go on trying to understand and forgive my parents and whatever happened in their childhood, with things like psychoanalysis and transactional analysis? What's the use? Whom does it help? It doesn't help my parents to see the truth. But it does prevent me from experiencing my feelings, the feelings that would give me access to the truth. But under the bell-jar of forgiveness, feelings cannot and may not blossom freely.

- Author: [Alice Miller](https://www.leafyquotes.com/alice-miller.md)
- Book: [Breaking Down The Wall Of Silence](https://www.leafyquotes.com/alice-miller/breaking-down-the-wall-of-silence.md)
- Source: [Wikiquote](https://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Alice_Miller_(psychologist)#Breaking_Down_the_Wall_of_Silence_(1991)) ([CC BY-SA 4.0](https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/4.0/))
- Quote page: https://www.leafyquotes.com/alice-miller/breaking-down-the-wall-of-silence/by-refusing-to-forgive

## More from this book

> Hard as it is to believe, in the entire world there is not a single faculty in which a degree is offered in the study of psychic injuries in childhood.

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/alice-miller/breaking-down-the-wall-of-silence/hard-as-it.md)

> Parents are indeed capable of routinely torturing their children without anyone interceding.

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/alice-miller/breaking-down-the-wall-of-silence/parents-are-indeed.md)

> Psychoanalysis does not distort the truth by accident. It does so by necessity. It is an effective system for the suppression of the truth about childhood, a truth feared by our entire society. Not surprisingly, it enjoys great esteem among intellectuals... Fear of the truth about child abuse is a leitmotif of nearly all forms of therapy known to me.

[Quote page](https://www.leafyquotes.com/alice-miller/breaking-down-the-wall-of-silence/psychoanalysis-does-not.md)